Actively seeking out the heart of God…

Somehow, all that matters now, You are holy. Sometimes I forget that it is as simple as that. God is holy. God is good. God is beautiful. And He is all that matters. Not all of this junk that the world throws at us and tries to make us believe is really important.

To bring all that we are to God seems sometimes to be such an impossible task. I feel like I give it all over, give over all of my cares, my worries, my passions, my life, but then i still feel as if I am no where nearer to Him. To actively seek the heart of God is the adventure of a lifetime, but also possibly one of the hardest things to ever be done. I want to pray for real, no fancy language that changes just for prayer. I want to want what He wants. I want to feel compassion that moves me right down to my core. I want to bring joy to His heart. I want to live my life after Jesus. Persecution scares me, and I suppose that is natural. Somedays I realize that it will be okay because God is good and in the end it doesn’t matter the outcome, other days I freak out and question myself.

This life is not about me. This life is about bringing glory to a God who is bigger than anything we could possibly imagine. Therefore living for any purpose other than His is pointless. The audience of one.

These things don’t pertain to Israel much, but as I sit here looking toward Bethlehem, I realize that it was just a few short miles away that this crazy man who people wanted dead, the one that I yearn so much to be with, to have communion with, to know, was born, only to die for the crap that I did that so painfully broke His heart because He loves me.


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